Hey, I think these quirky skits were originally written by me, Aray. Please tell me if you find an earlier source, and which of these I’ve done with you or that you are familiar with. Email: aray2ltd@gmail.com
SOMETIMES
Aray. Most times, sometimes is an appropriate answer to a question.
Ben. No, perhaps a few times.
Aray. At times.
Ben. Rarely.
Aray. More times.
Ben. Oft times.
Aray. Ok let’s agree on oft times. Oft times, sometimes is a good and accurate answer to a question.
Ben. But that’s rude!
Aray. True sometimes. BTW please don’t answer your teacher’s questions like that. You’ll probably just annoy them, show you’re being a jerk, won’t learn anything with that behaviour or attitude, and get zero marks.
Ben. You are crazy.
Aray. Not true. But myBA and I&IBA is; Sometimes.
Answer the question Yes or No!
(If someone wants you to say yes or no, then consider the following.)
(BenAsks a question)
(Aray Answers)
Aray. Sometimes.
Ben: Answer the question Yes or No!
Aray. I think sometimes is a more accurate answer.
Ben: I will take that as a yes / no.
Aray. Do so, If yoba want to ruin your reputation and display ignorance, cantankerous belligerence and lack of clear appropriate thought.
Ben. What do you mean?
Aray. The world is not in black and white. There is a whole range of colours. Even a black and white photo has levels of grey. I’ve given you my accurate answer, but if it’s not what you want to hear, choose your own. If you can only think in terms of yes or no, please don’t ask me to join you.
YOUR Definition of philosophy
Aray. What is YOUR definition of philosophy?
Ben. Eh?
Aray. Not THE definition, but YOUR definition. You know the word, so define it or explain the concept.
(Ben Gives Answer such as)
Ben. Logic
(After some discussion and exposition)
Aray. Interesting. I’ve asked many people that question, and I’m amazed by the variety of answers. We all know the word and think everyone has our definition, but many people have different definitions. Oh BTW most women give a similar answer.
Ben. What is that?
Aray. You have to ask people and conduct your own survey to find that out.
A Highlight
Aray. Excuse me, may I ask you another question?
Ben. But you didn’t ask me a question. I’ve never spoken to you before.
Aray. May I ask you another question is a question. Anyway, just pretend I did. May I ask you another question?
Ben. Ok
Aray. What has been A highlight of your year so far?
Ben. Eh?
Aray. By highlight I mean something that you have done and enjoyed, or something that happened to you and you liked, or one of those times you felt really good, or at peace, or had a good belly laugh.
(Ben answers the question and gives an example highlight. There follows a discussion lasting several minutes.)
Aray. Thanks for sharing. The point of the question is: at certain times of the year, (e.g. on your birthday or near year end) think of some of your highlights. Something that you have done and enjoyed, or something that happened to you and you liked, or one of those times you felt really good, or at peace, or had a good belly laugh. Then when you’re thought of lots and lots of them, think what you can do to have many more highlights in the coming year.
Enjoy! Whatever, you DO.
I’m complete
Ben. Are you alright?
Aray. No!
Ben. Huh, sorry to hear that.
Aray. Don’t be. I’m better than alright.
Ben. Hmm?
Aray. I’m complete. I have a left, middle and a right.
I’m More complete than I thought
Ben. Are you alright?
Aray. No!
Ben. Huh, What’s the problem.
Aray. I’ve been short selling myself.
Ben. Huh?
Aray. I told someone I’m complete. I have a left, center and a right. (They didn’t get the political reference). They pointed out I also have a top, middle and a bottom. And someone else added “You have a back and front too”
Ben. I mean, Are you good?
Aray: Well partly.
Ben: Huh?
Aray: The issue is when things that are good inside me come out they are not good?
Ben: What do you mean?
Aray: Like my sweat or even spit coming out of my mouth.
Ben: Yuck? Enough! So are you OK then?
Aray: Yes I’m OK.
Ben: OK
Aray: OK
( CC BY-NC-SA 4.0)